20
Aug
09

Starting my Nixon list

I’ve decided that Nixon may have been on to something with his whole “enemies list” thing. And maybe … just maybe … I ought to keep one, too.

Right now, the first enemy that I’m adding is “The River’s Casino.”

Oh, I hates you.

Oh, I hates you.

This has nothing to do with the gambling aspect. I’m all for legalized gambling, and taxing the crap out of it. I mean, it’s been said that slots are nothing but a tax on the stupid, and with the abundance of stupid people out there, that’s a lot of dinero.

I iz gonna be a winnerz!

I iz a winnerz, but still can't drivez goodly!

But my main beef with the casino is the fact that those very same stupid people are out there, sharing my roads. In fact, as I left work tonight, I almost got the “T” treatment as someone just had to just blow through a red light to get there.

Oh, and here’s another example … one day I saw a little old lady in late ’80s caddy (complete with rusting roof and trunk) cruising down Route 28. Now, this wasn’t too bad, until you consider the fact that her left tire was on the yellow line or to the left of it (essentially driving partially on the shoulder), and she couldn’t go faster than 40 mph. And that doesn’t sound too terrible, except for the fact that 28 essentially is one lane in spots, and it’s obvious that granny should have had someone drive her down so she could get her fix.

Then there are the people who just get confused and stop … that’s right, just stop … to ask people for directions after you get off of 28 and are nearing the stadiums.

Route 28 is a bear to begin with, with the never ending construction and piss poor planning that went into it. But add these people to the mix, and it becomes a nightmare. Originally, I thought that the worst of drivers would be the Kenny Chesney fans, who soap up their windows to announce that they are going to a concert. But no! The slots mouthbreathers are, by far, the worst. Put 2 of them side by side, and they’ll have you pulling your hair out as they wrangle for the “Most stupid” title and jam up the road for no real reason.

So, Rivers Casino and your clientele, welcome to my list.

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