What not to say…

And yet another dating story from one of my friends. This is one from my friend, who I will call “Ninja,” who writes about her online dating experiences in Facebook’s notepad. (Hopefully I’ve convinced her to start her own blog, and if so, expect a link.) She included the guy’s name and photo, but I won’t, because that’s not how I roll. However, this story is too good not to share:

If a woman doesn’t respond to your personal ad the first time, writing this won’t help…especially if you look like a psycho in your profile photo.

” I hope this doesn’t offend you but I feel I have nothing to lose by being honest, I haven’t ever talked to you and it feel secure on here to say.

My c?ck twitches and swells when I see your pictures; I avoid looking at your profile because it makes me feel bad that this could offend you.

My honest feelings on the table, I can’t imagine if we met, there would be undoubted energy”

Saying how I want to projectile vomit after reading this just doesn’t seem expressive enough.

There would be energy indeed…expended when my foot met his groin. PERV!

Now, if this wasn’t bad enough, when I was asking Ninja for permission to use her story, she shared another little bit of information:

Hey, this story just got even better/more twisted. My sister saw the blog and pic last night, and said it looked a lot like her ex-boyfriend’s neighbor. Well, she confirmed with the ex-b/f (who she’s still friendly with) that it IS him, and he is married with kids. This scumbag also claims to have served in Iraq. Well, he was never in Iraq, but he was incarcerated for awhile. What a piece of work!

Wow. You know, I’ve dated a lot of crazies, but I think this person goes above and beyond …


3 Responses to “What not to say…”

  1. September 30, 2009 at 12:22 pm

    Things that an obsessed stalker would say.
    Things that make you want a handgun.
    Things that make you put the police on speed-dial.
    Things that won’t end well.

  2. 2 curt
    October 8, 2009 at 2:49 pm

    That is some crazy sh!t. BUT, I bet that line works 2 times out of 100. So a 2% chance at ass is better than 0. Even if you lose your dignity in the process.

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