Posts Tagged ‘hell

06
Nov
08

The road to hell …

We all know that saying — “The road to hell is paved with good intentions.” Today, I am living it.

I decided for mom’s Christmas and birthday gift to basically build her a new computer and have her join the modern age. And wow, the experience has been epitome of “fiasco.”

Mom’s rig was my old computer, which was pretty cool back in like, oh, maybe 1996. We’re talking a 366 celeron processor, maybe like a whopping 128 megs of RAM and like a 16g hard drive. OK, I’m a nerd and I tee-hee’d while typing that all out — but you old timers, I’m sure, remember those e-Machines from Circuit City. Whel-hel-hel-hell, that sucker is still kickin’. And it’s still running Windows 98. And it’s all original parts — except for the RAM upgrade. I think it originally came with 64 megs. Tee-hee!

Im afraid I cant let you do that, Three.

I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Three.

Now, I’m not a tech, but I’m generally pretty handy with computers and can generally get to where I want to be without a major struggle. I mean, I built my rig from the ground up — 3.6g x2 Athlon, ASUS motherboard, 500g HD (cause my old 60g crapped out on me), 3g of RAM, rockin’ videocard — all in a sleek black HAL case (for all you “2001 Odyssey” fans). It’s stable, it’s fun, it’s everything I need with chips and salsa on the side. Mmm. Chips and salsa. Man I wish Iguana Grill would open back up. I miss that place.

So, the original plan was to basically rebuild my old Compaq and give her that. Except, for whatever reason, the motherboard completely died on me. I had already ordered an 80g HD for it, so, no biggie … I figured I’d just get a new motherboard, throw that into a new case and we’re good to go.

But instead of listening to my instincts — I opted to cheap out and get her some lesser quality parts (cause, you know, it’s not like she’s playing Warcraft all day into the wee hours of the morning — she’s typing e-mails and stories, and watching the occasional wacky video or e-card). What’s the result so far? Motherboard — DOA. $15 Power Supply — alive, surprisingly. Sleek white cheapy case has blue ground effects. Why? I don’t know. But I’m sure mom will be rockin’ with it.

I have yet to send the motherboard back to NewEgg (don’t worry, I still love you NewEgg) — so in the meantime, I bascially threw her old rig into the new case and decided to install XP on the new HD since I know she doesn’t have anything backed up.

OH. DEAR. LORD.

If I ever do that again with such a painfully slow machine, someone shoot me in the face. Really.

Just catching XP up-to-date with the Service Packs and various security fixes took ALL FREAKIN’ DAY. And by ALL FREAKIN DAY, I do, infact, mean ALL FREAKIN’ DAY.

Of course, as I type this, I have about 5 different options clanging around in my head. “Oh, I should just take everything out of the case, put it back into the old case, and then when the new motherboard comes in, reinstall everything at my leisure and present it to her.”

That would make sense. Why didn’t I do that 8 hours earlier?

Christ on a pony. Someone get me a beer. I’m going back in …

And she better freakin’ like it when all’s said and done — that’s all I’m sayin’.

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