Posts Tagged ‘Twitter



If there is one thing I absolutely loathe on Twitter, it’s people “retweeting” (aka as an “RT”) tweets referring to their zodiac sign … from daily predictions to personality traits. I don’t know what this is supposed to accomplish — I mean, I like astrology, I think it’s fun — but this shit drives me insane.

I know what set me off this time … it was a friend RTing a “Sexstrology” tweet. Here it is:

“Can change their voice and appearance very easily.” Like talk lower and put on a fake mustache? Like dye their hair and talk like Mickey Mouse? LIKE CHANGE THEIR CLOTHES OR WEAR A CAPE OR PUT ON GLASSES? Who COULDN’T do any of these with relative ease?

I just couldn’t let this one go.

It started off innocently enough …

… and then, of course, it snowballed.

So, here’s your official Sheepstrology. They’re not really in any order, and are broken up to avoid responses and tweets that weren’t Sheepstrology. And again, read from the bottom to the top of each section, cause that’s how the timeline order goes.

Round 2:

Round 3:

Round 5:

Round 6:

And lastly, as always:

(And yes, I realize I’m the world’s laziest blogger by posting these … but after the Ask Romney post, I have people asking me to do it. Maybe this will require a new category … )


Ask Romney

Sometimes, I don’t know what gets into me.

It started off innocently enough. I saw people tweeting with the #AskRomney hashtag on the Twitters and decided to ask one or two of my own. Chance had asked a question and referenced “Mad Max III: Beyond Thunderdome”, so naturally I had to jump in. (Now, if you’re not used to Twitter, the first comment is actually at the bottom, because it’s a timeline, and I’m entirely too lazy to try and crop the images and arrange them in chronological order.)

Then after that, I don’t know what happened. The questions just started flowing. I was fixing a computer, and the oddest thoughts just started pouring out.

This section, you’ll probably want to read from the bottom up.

And so it went.


And so on …

And lastly …

Sadly, they would have kept going had we not experienced a rash of server issues that distracted me and totally ruined my mojo. Stupid work.

I’m taking this as a sign that my creativity needs an outlet. Maybe I’ll get back to writing more than once per bazillion years.

(And again, thanks to all the people who tweeted at me that they were laughing really hard about my questions … that totally fueled me. Appreciate it!)


Here’s the deal

How some react to being unfollowed on Twitter.

The tweet read something like this: “For all you haters who can’t handle me talkin about the Steelers, #UNFOLLOW.”

And when I say “something like this,” I mean that it was chock full of internet speak and misspellings and such, but that was the tweeter’s style, and I kinda let those things go.

But the tweeter had a point. Why argue or be annoyed by what someone is tweeting? You have a choice to follow them or not, so exercise that choice, right? It’s a simple click of the mouse, almost like changing the channel on your TV. Annoyance, gone. Life can go forward unhindered.

So I took the tweeter’s advice, and I unfollowed some people. Probably less than 10, but it also included the tweeter. Why? Because said tweeter and I were/are different people. That person was all RAH RAH Steelers to a point of ultra-obnoxiousness. I mean, I love my team … but I don’t feel the need to scream in your face about it or trash talk the opponent. Nor do I feel the need to bet on it. Nor does my happiness hinge on their winning/losing. That behavior gets boorish. I figured it was probably for the best that I moved on. Click, bam, done.

The next day, said user called me out (and about 4 or 5 other people) for unfollowing, calling us “lame.” And then a few of said tweeter’s fans called us out, too … one being an avatar of a muscular chest that explained, “Maybe they just couldn’t handle THE GREATNESS.”

Yes. Greatness. Couldn’t handle it. That’s it.

The response reassured me that I had made the proper decision. And after that, I unfollowed a few more folks. They weren’t terrible people by any means, but a tweeter can’t live on 4square check-ins and a couple of RTs alone.

Next thing I know, I’m on a list called, “The Unfollowers.” This list claims that the people on it violate the unwritten “follow me, I’ll follow you back” rule … or if they do follow you back, they’ll unfollow you shortly after in some silly attempt to look ultra-popular. Whatever the case, this list says, “We’re watching you.” Whomever “we” are. Twitter secret police, I guess.

At any rate, this kinda pisses me off. First off, I’ve gone from someone who didn’t understand the value of Twitter to being a complete Twitter addict. I’ve met a lot of new folks because of it … and by met, I do mean in person. Craft beer snobs, bikers, hikers, newspaper veterans, photographers, IT folks, chefs … with the circle of friendly folks out there, if I have a question about something, I can ask, and chances are someone has a good answer for me. It’s awesome.

But the whole unfollowing thing? Most of the folks who I have unfollowed are celebrities or pro-atheletes. Out of the local crowd, if you’re spamming contests or constantly (and obnoxiously) promoting your business or site, then chances are I’m going to unfollow. If we’re just different people that can’t find a common ground to communicate on, I’m going to unfollow. And, quite honestly, I’m not going to feel badly about it. You don’t get along with everyone in real life, why would something like Twitter be any different? It’s just on Twitter, it’s much easier to deal with that whole thing. Click, bam, done.

Not all bots are created equally

Secondly, that whole “unwritten rule” is bubkis. You know what I learned? I don’t care if you follow me or not … if you’re providing info about stuff that I’m interested in or that brightens my day, I don’t need you to follow me back. If you do, that’s a bonus. Quite honestly, I don’t even pay attention to who is following me anymore. If you pop up in my “followers” list (not that I look, but the new Twitter shoves that in your face), cool! If not, cool! The amount of spambots that follow my unlocked account have crushed my will to check on that kind of thing. Honestly, out of my 500+ followers, I assume that 50 are real people. That’s probably way off, but that’s about the number of “regulars” that I interact with … so the other 450 have to lurkers, stalkers or bots, right? Right. Bots it is.

But if Twitter’s “Follow me, I’ll follow you” unwritten rule IS important to you, here’s a key ingredient to getting followed … LET ME KNOW YOU’RE A HUMAN. And if you are human, PLEASE HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY. Retweets and links to pictures get really old. I really don’t mind you promoting your business every now and then, but constantly … well, you’re going to make me earn my spot on the Twitter secret police list.


1 degree of separation

So, the other day, one of the folks I occasionally chat with on Twitter — @JilltheDuchess — threw up a tweet about having sushi and seeing Salma Hayek at a nearby table. She also mentioned that Salma was prettier in public, smaller than expected (I think Salma is like 5′ or something), and even snapped a quick picture and posted on Twitter, saying, “I’m not normally this person, but…”

Now, Salma is one of my favorite actresses … no, wait, let me correct that … Salma is freakin hot, and in my silly fantasy world, I’d marry that woman. So, naturally, I had to say something to Jill, since Salma was nearby. I told Jill to give Salma a hug for me, not thinking anything else would follow.

Instead, I got this:

(and yes, I’m horrified that I spelled Salma’s name wrong, but I was typing fast)

Now, whether Jill actually did this or not, I don’t know. But it was pretty cool to think that instead of having 6 degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon, that I had 1 degree of separation from Salma Hayek.

(Of course, she’s probably thinking the same thing.  “Whew! Dodged that bullet! Stupid fanboys.”)


For those other people

Since a bunch of my friends DON’T use Twitter (and technically, I can’t say that I blame them. I still haven’t found a real “use” for it yet), this post is for them.

If you’re in the Pittsburgh area, you know about the controversy on Tuesday — we had an impending storm and no one was saying where young Mayor Luke Ravenstahl was. Well, people started throwing out ideas of where he could be, with Pittgirl jokingly saying that he was in New Orleans for Mardi Gras.

Well, I for whatever reason, I just took the #WhereisLuke trend tag and ran with it. So, here’s what you missed, Twitter-less readers:



Now, it all turns out that the mayor was in Pittsburgh, and he was “doing work.” He said that the lack of knowledge about where he was was “meant to teach the media a lesson” that “they don’t have to know where he is all the time.”

Or, otherwise, summed up:


In my head

Every now and then, I hit a wall, and become punch drunk. This became evident today in a Twitter conversation with my long time friend, Purplecar.

It always starts off innocently enough…

But then…

Naturally, I know I have caused confusion, and at this point, am giggling stupidly.

See, because I know Purplecar, I can just envision her blinking her eyes, a confused look of “WTF?!” on her face because she’s knows that it’s something obscure and stupid, and it’s vaguely familiar … and that makes me laugh even harder. So, I have to let her in on it …

(Gary is her husband, and one of my old fraternity brothers.)

For those who are still confused, this is what I’m quoting:

And then there are other conversations that I start innocently enough, because stupid notions come into my head (names removed to protect the innocent) …

The response?

Oh, watch as I completely whiff on Tim’s joke … yeah, I’m out of it.

So if I leave you an obscure sounding tweet or comment, believe it or not, it does actually make some sort of sense … to me … and even then, it’s iffy.




So, as most of you know, I’ve joined the world of Twitter. I kept hearing about how important of a tool it is, especially if you linger in the social media world. Hey, I blog! I’m in that social media world! How can I live my life one more second without such a miraculous thing? I mean, it’s like Billy Mays returned from the grave and told me how insignificant I am for not having a Twitter  account. I got it Billy! I signed up! And I swear I’ll use OxyClean! Stop haunting me!

So, after taking Billy’s advice, all I can say is “Whaaaaaa?”

Since signing up, my life doesn’t feel any richer. Or different.  And sure, my whites are a little bit whiter, but I don’t think that has anything to do with Twitter.

Maybe it’s because I’m still wrangling with the concept of what Twitter actually does. No one can seem to tell me. For me, it’s just a mass instant messenger, except you really don’t expect a response. It’s more of a “Hey! You should check this out!” — in other words, a way to promo stuff or get news out quickly.

In that context, yeah, I can see its value —  if I were a celebrity and I wanted to announce something to my fans. Or an organization. Or a sports team that has a couple billion fans. “Quick,” “effective” and “cheap” are blessed words to a group with a need for mass communication.

But other than that, I’m kinda befuddled as to what it can do for a regular guy like myself.

See, here’s my predicament: Generally speaking, the same people who are following me on Twitter are already my Facebook friends. Predominately, my blog’s readers are also my FB friends. So, that being stated, why shouldn’t I just keep up with FBing my statuses and forgo the whole Twitter experience?

I’ve been trying to figure this stuff out … really, I have. But for me, Twitter is like some crazy gizmo that you’d see in the Far Side (Gary Larson is a genius, btw) — it has a boot, a duck head wearing a top hat that’s connected to a spring, a corkscrew handle and a slinky.

OK, I see it’s there. I’ve picked it up and kicked it around a little. But my initial question still remains — what is it that I’m actually supposed to do with this thing?

Follow me, Twittering fools!


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